"My Old Age" Jan.30.10

Another go at this. Old age must be on my mind.

My Old Age
It’s the end of the rainbow
My heaven if you will, (I won’t)
Why work hard all your life?
Why do more than you need to do?

I can’t think of a greater reward for a life well lived
Than to grow old with someone by my side -
Certainly not seventy-two virgins – a temptation that is all too shallow, temporary, physical
Nor the semitransparent heavens of Valhalla, Eden, or Avalon – amorphous amalgamations of superlatives – the best, unending, most beautiful

I want to reach my 60th anniversary -
To pass conspiratorial winks to visitors
To walk outside each morning and feed the birds like my grandfather
To complain and complain and enjoy and enjoy
To have millions of reasons for that smile to keep crossing my face
To be that old couple, slow dancing –
So close together - their bodies, their movement –
That they seem like one

I want to know happiness in comparison to sorrow
I want the dynamism of life and the depth of relationship
I want surprises and uncertainty and worry
I want to fight for love even as my legs give way underneath me
I want to be that old couple that has made it – not through the tunnel of life, but up, and down, and up, to the best vista in a mountain range - wrinkled, shriveled, tired -
Together